Idiot

It is rare that we at Bogun Towers can be so forthright in our condemnation of our subject's stupidity but on this occasion we are on firm ground. We present the facts unvarnished for your consideration:-

1. He borrows a pool car from work to get to Birmingham for Friday and Monday.
2. He therefore leaves his own car at work in Bristol.
3. Tuesday morning he drives down to Bristol in the pool car.
4. Tuesday evening he intends to drive back to Birmingham in his own car.
5. However Tuesday morning, half way down the M5, he remembers his car keys are in...Birmingham.

If anyone disagrees with our "Idiot" analysis do let us know.

Political slot

We at Bogun Towers try to steer clear of political commentary but we feel obliged on occasion to step into the fray and this is one of those occasions.

Our previous Foreign Secretary was, to say the least, an uninspiring character; Margaret Beckett surely comes top of the list of women least likely to reach high office (run a close second by the new Home Secretary but that is another matter) and as her idea of a foreign holiday was to take the caravan to Cornwall her qualifications for the Foreign office looked a little thin but at least she tried to do the job.

Our latest incarnation, David Miliband, simply cannot even be bothered to do the job; this week the Saudi Arabian King and his Foreign Secretary are in town for their first visit in some 20 years, unsurprisingly many months ago a meeting was arranged between Miliband and the Saudi Foreign Secretary but at the weekend Miliband cancelled the meeting because he considered that the Saudis are not important enough in providing stability in the Middle East, keeping terrorism at bay and in controlling massive oil reserves to make them more important that somebody else’s child joining his family.

We despair.

Shoptastic

A quiet weekend has just passed, indeed perhaps the quietest weekend he has had for some time. Having spent most of Saturday asleep (no doubt catching up from the sleep shortage built up over that period) he got up just in time to watch the Ospreys stuff Worcester and then decided to go and see about buying a new TV.

20 minutes later (what a salesman's dream) he walked out of the store with a new 50 inch TV, surround sound system and Playstation 3 and quiet a lot poorer.

He has managed to avoid using a credit card since before his travels and so unsurprisingly the fraud program at his credit card company was set aringing by this purchase and telephone authorisation required. The usual stumbling through security questions and trying to guess the password set many years ago followed. However it is clear that the credit card people were really nervous about this transaction as about 20 minutes later they rang him to check that it really was him. Now one security check would seem reasonable but two?

Cheetah

We at Bogun towers have been intrigued by this video. In the year 2007 and so many years after the fall of apartheid is it really appropriate for 2 fat Afrikaans to be setting a wild cat on a black man?

York Races, Part 2

Having survived the delightful horror of finding last night's kebab, girded his loins for turning up at the racecourse in tails and dealt with Daf's new look the troops headed to the Knavesmire for the Ebor meet.

Polly of course won on the first two races and despite the foul weather and some criminally poor luck on his behalf a first class time was had by all. He of course was the only person at the races in tails which had the surprising advantage that none of the gate-wardens asked him to produce his badge and so he found himself in the owners' enclosure towards the end of the day.

With money rolling out of everyone else's pockets they went into town to the Lowther (scene of much drinking in times gone past) to watch the rugby (apparently England were playing France in a semi-final). With the dinner table booked for half-time the party rather split between the girls who hate rugger and the welsh on the one side and the others on the other side with the first side heading to dinner and the others staying in the pub and cheering themselves hoarse.

With England through to the final, what a miracle, an inordinate quantity of booze flowed late into the night.

The best said about Sunday is that breakfast was splendid, the 4 hour train trip less so.

Another first class weekend with chums, well done Polly.

York races, part 1

To celebrate the splendid Polly's birthday a mob of the usual suspects descended on their Alma Mater (York) to drink, eat and gamble at the races. Having all survived the various horrors of their journeys they headed into town hitting the Hansom Cab (scened of many a horror in years gone by) amongst others.

The inestimable Jib-cub was roused out of his den and was on fine form and not changed a bit, the last time he was scene was some 11 years ago, whilst claiming tiredness our hero called it a night around 1130. He purchased a kebab on the way home which he promptly forgot about and put in the freezer much to everyone's surprise when discovered the next morning.

Unicum not Kumul

Apparently we were mistaken in reporting the drinking of Kumul as it appears the actual firewater was something called Unicum. We apologise to the makers of Kumul for blackening their good name and wholeheartedly blacken the names of the makers of Unicum instead.

We are sailing, again

Part 2 of his lengthy trip away (passim) was a couple of days sailing in the Solent. In accordance with usual principles on arrival on the good ship Whistler his response to the query, "so got your oilskins and sleeping bag?" was a resounding no.

A few fevered moments running round the chandlery turned up some spare oilskins to his considerably relief as the forecast was not exactly brillant.

No such problems on day one however with conditions totally becalmed and the sailing really being motoring. Day two however was much more to our liking with the rain horizontal the visibility a touch poor (always a treat in the busiest piece of water in the world) and as can be assumed with him tied to the helm he copped the worst of it, particularly as it became apparent early doors that the oilskins were lying around spare for a reason (their lack of oilskin type qualities).

The horror of Kumul

His long trip away's first leg involved a dinner party thrown by the inestimable Christine and Chris (the other guests being Dogs, Glen and TCO). A splendid feast was layed on and great badinage and conversation ensued until the Kumul hove into view. Kumul is an Hungarian spirit and is uttely repellant; meths would be a more attractive digestif.

He rapidly fell down hill with that inside him and awoke the next morning with a raging hangover. Imagine his joy therefore that due to engineering works he could not get back to his mother's by public transport.

Forget me not - Part 2

Several days away from home were planned and his forgetfuly streak bore up well with him opening his bag at his mother's on Saturday morning to discover a complete lack of socks and underwear. Should be charming come the end of his trip.

Forget me not - Part 1

His employers took a table recently at the Birmingham Brain Game for Macmillan Cancer Relief. He failed to check the dress code and was delighted to be informed 5 minutes before it was due to start it was dinner suits. A quick check at home revealed his dinner suit was not in Brum but in Bristol and so a frantic trek round Brum ensured which ended with him buying a new dinner suit.

As he said to Dicky on getting to the event, "if I see anyone in lounge suits there is going to be trouble." His joy was unconfined when he spotted Austin Healey wearing one.

Recovering his composure did not seem to aid the team much as they came around the bottom third for the evening. Plenty of beer was consumed so not all bad.