Controversy at the cricket

The usual difficulties attended the Chairman's efforts in getting a side out, until that is he decided to bully paralegals into playing. They seem surprisingly amenable to turning out for the side, presumably they think that cricket prowess might get them a training contract.

As usual, of course, Gilder let the firm down by dropping out on the day of the match. Fortunately his backsliding was foreseen (doesn't really take a soothsayer to foresee that) and so a full side was still cobbled together.

In light of the time of year it was felt that an earlyish start was necessary and so it was agreed to get to the ground in time for a 1745 kick-off. Of course the council had other ideas and decided to ruin the roads near the ground with some timely road-works so by the time everyone had hacked through the traffic it was well past 1815 and a shortened game was agreed.

Again as usual the CW mob were the last to turn up and so it was agreed that they would bat first.

Williams opened the batting as usual but without Webb (who was late) and so Ringer A stood in.

It's fair to record that their opening bowlers had a bit about them and had the two of them hopping around before Williams top-edged a delivery into his head which then ballooned up to the 'keeper. The head injury may have contributed to the later events (stay tuned but if you thought the events at the Oval were controversial then prepare to be appalled).

Ringer A got a peach but Earl and Webb steadied the ship with some fine hitting. A glorious square cut from Webb will live in the memory for some time as will the enormous 6 over cow corner from Earl which smashed into one of the opposition's Mercedes.

Webb as usual failed to push on and fell to a top edge whilst Thomas fell in similar circumstances. Earl retired and Welch, on debut, carved his first ball for CW for a lovely 4. He then set about the bowling with some relish. Ringer B played round a straight one and Holt just buckled down for the long run.

Welch retired and Wright struck some lusty blows at the end to get the score up to 107 for 5.

Webb and Ringer B opened the bowling. Webb got a wicket in his first and second overs (one a catch from Holt showing he still hasn't lost it) whilst Ringer B got 2 in 2 balls in his second (one a glorious stumping) leaving them reeling.

Then the head injury started to take over. He proceeded to get right up their noses by whipping the bails off every delivery and then having a row with them about the definition of a no ball. Things got somewhat less than friendly between batsman and 'keeper and some choice words were exchanged. So bad was the blood that a clear run out appeal had to be withdrawn to settle the tension.

Meanwhile a game of cricket was passing by. Thomas and Ringer A bowled quite tidily; Thomas got a wicket. Earl, Wright and Welch got a bit of a carting but as the skipper had Webb to bring back on (in the pitch black) the match was in the balance.

With 35 needed off the last 4 overs and only 6 off the last over it was a good tight match. Webb bowled a great final over and with Earl and Williams combining for a tidy run out Webb finished the game with 2 wickets with the last 2 balls winning the game by 1 run.

As the team wandered off Williams muttered to the skipper that he couldn't see why the appeal had been withdrawn; the skipper pointed out that RBS are (were?) one of the firm's biggest clients. Williams observed, "well they don't instruct my department", very collegiate.

Fortunately a round of handshakes all round and the situation was defused with somewhat greater aplomb than the mess at the Oval.

Batting

Ringer A Bwld. Golding 3
Williams Ct. Bailey Malkin 0
Earl Not Out 26
Webb Ct. Mithcard 11
Thomas Ct. Watts Tregale 4
Welch Not Out 25
Ringer B Bwld. Tregale 3
Holt Not Out 8
Wright Not Out 17
Extras (7 W, 2 NB, 1 B, 1 LB) 11
Total 107 for 5
Did not bat Simmons, Beaumont

Bowling
O M R W
Webb 4 0 23 4
Ringer B 2 0 12 2
Thomas 3 0 10 1
Ringer A 2 0 6 0
Earl 2 0 14 0
Welch 2 0 22 0
Wright 1 0 11 0